Hi, everybody!

I was a member of the fuquara years ago, when it was only Sidi himself, not Ibrahim, that was running things. I am in a bit of a quandry as to whether or not to pursue an 'dissenter' website, as I have mostly put whatever abuses I experienced behind me, or chalked them up as 'learning experiences'.

Everybody leaving a totalistic religion, cult, or society has regrets, both for leaving and for joining. At some times I yearn for the experience of being taken care of in a certain way, having access to a direct conduit to God, that I experienced in Sidi's group.

On the other hand, I was relieved I didn't any longer have to make excuses for the inappropriate and incredible things I witnessed there, the foremost of which was a fascination with 'spiritual' marriages which linked 'beloveds' of totally different ages, temperments, and socio-economic backgrounds.

It is not for me to try and understand Sidi's psychology. Perhaps there is more wisdom than darkness there. I would not go so far as to accuse him of being a fraud. I would say that he was put in the position of being the mouthpiece of the Eternal God by his followers, at least, and in my observation, he did nothing to disenamour them of this notion.

Today, he seems happily linked to one of the most ridiculously vapid New Age Alternative Healing peddlars of expensive hokum you might ever wish NOT to find. That person now purports to be able to cure cancer and AIDS. I am NOT kidding here!

Sadly, that person's wife died of cancer and he wasn't able to heal HER!

I never had experiences with that person, if you did, please leave them here! I fail to understand the attraction to him, though I can to Sidi.

Whether you believe in God, Islam, Sufism, or nothing, I think everyone should be allowed to ask questions. Life can be brutal, maybe life IS brutal. You get a taste of that and you want comfort. Someone shows up and says, 'I can help you understand and transcend that'. You're vulnerable and you want to believe. Then the Guide marries you to someone. Now you are REALLY committed. Some, if not all, of the old pain is gone. HURRAY!

So where has Jane gone? Jane is now Jamila. A new being, made by the Guide and with a new
family of brothers and sisters. A holier, better family.

You might as well think of the Guide as God, because he as done what God did, created a new being out of nothing. It's all so easy, right?

A spiritual path and life does NOT depend on your pledging allegiance to a human teacher. In fact, I think one can in effect 'pass' on one's spiritual quest by merely following someone else instead of being ruthlessly honest about one's own drawbacks, addictions, shortcomings, etc.

Well, anyway, you can respond here, start a thread of your own. I don't want to ruin someone's party. But, on the other hand, if you don't have doubts, why are you reading this? Peace!